Readers to the rescue – Dining with imbibers

When out to dinner with friends, what’s the most polite way to get the heavier drinkers to pay proportionately more for their share of the check? –J., New York City

Lighten up. Sometimes you order chicken, sometimes steak. Sometimes your friends eat pasta, other times pork chops. What kind of friendship can’t survive a few dollars here and there? On your deathbed, will you care more that you didn’t save the extra $10 or $100 or that you spent that ..read more

Readers to the rescue – Asking for more

Lately my company has shown slight gains in revenue, and we’re starting to hire again. I haven’t had a raise in three years. When can I ask for one? –S., Littleton, Mass.

Don’t make it personal. It would be better to ask if the company plans to resume raises this quarter or next. –Scott Walker, Cheyenne

What’s your advice to this reader? Post your comment below.

Filed under: Readers' Choice, Uncategorized

Readers to the rescue – Family payback

Is there a good way to collect on a debt from a relative who hasn’t paid up? –R., Chico, Calif.

With kindness and respect in a conversation or letter, try to find a workable solution. Maybe you can offer your relative a longer time to repay or take goods or services in lieu of cash. –Amanda, Beaverton, Ore. You can resort to legal remedies, but if you’ll face this person at family functions for the next 20 years, that may ..read more

Readers to the rescue – Covering college

By the time my son graduates from college, I’ll be nearing retirement. I’m willing to pay for his BA but not grad school. Am I being selfish? –S., Birmingham, Ala.

Your son can take out a loan; you pay the interest until he finds a job after graduation. Then he can pay the loan (and maybe even repay you). This should take the pressure off him and you. –Tom, Boston

Too many parents feel obligated to promote their children while ..read more

Readers to the rescue – Full disclosure

I may be selling my condo. A neighbor’s cigarette smoke is sometimes noticeable in one of my bathrooms. Am I obligated to tell potential buyers? –N., Alexandria, Va.

If an odor from an adjacent unit penetrates your home, contact your property manager and demand that it be fixed. In all likelihood, there’s a small hole somewhere in the bathroom that allows this odor to transmit from one unit to another, and it can be repaired. –Bill Wertz, Friday Harbor, Wash. ..read more

Readers to the rescue – Credit snooping

Is it ethical to check on a spouse’s credit card balances? –M., Sioux City, Iowa

Your spouse could have bought you a gift and you’d spoil the fun. But if you really want to see the card balance, I would ask and set a time to go over all of your statements together. –Angela Kidwell-West, Louisville

If you’re curious, ask your spouse. Otherwise it’s up there with reading a personal diary. –John Champoux, Breckenridge, Colo.

No, it’s not ethical. If ..read more

Readers to the rescue – Estate rights

My mom is 87 and in poor health. My sister lives nearby but has little contact with her, while I’m very involved with her care. Am I entitled to a larger share of her estate? –R., Ohio Here’s how we resolved a similar situation: My sister-in-law is paid a mutually agreed upon sum from her mom’s account for the care she provides. That way there are no hard feelings, and both siblings will share the inheritance equally. –E., Bridgewater, N.J. ..read more

Readers to the Rescue – Splitting heirs

My daughter, a pharmacist, earns more than my son, a middle-school teacher. I am proud of them both but plan to leave most of my estate to my son. Am I being fair? –K., Richardson, Texas

Economic situations can change, and your daughter could face greater financial difficulties at some point in the future. Leave an equal amount to both children and allow them to work out any monetary adjustments between themselves. –Ben Finney, Atlanta

Split your estate fifty-fifty and ..read more

Readers to the Rescue

Weigh in with your own advice for readers facing tough financial decisions or grappling with challenging situations involving money, manners, and ethics.

Friends come to me for advice regarding their  investments. I’m no CFP, but I have a good grasp of the basics and give well-researched recommendations. Is providing this advice a mistake?  –Peter from Fairfax Station, Va.

Readers to the Rescue

Weigh in with your own advice for readers facing tough financial decisions or grappling with challenging situations involving money, manners, and ethics.

By the time my son graduates from college, I’ll be nearing retirement. I’m willing to pay for his BA but feel like anything after that is his responsibility. Am I being selfish? –Harley from Birmingham, Ala

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